Inferior Imitator

ep·i·gone n. A second-rate imitator or follower, especially of an artist or a philosopher.

Sunday, June 28, 2009

And You Blame God When You're Lonely

I fill up my life with meaningless bullshit because I'm lonely. I go through the motions of living a life, pretending I enjoy it and sometimes I even fool myself into thinking it's true. There were a few precious years where I wasn't lonely and I spent them thinking it was too good to be true and it was. Slowly I lost it all and I'm right back where I started except now I know what it's like to not be lonely and it makes it worse. And I've always had hope but now I'm slowly losing that too. If I don't have hope I don't know why I bother holding out for what I really want - I should just settle for something else. But if I settle that means I don't know who I am anymore, if I haven't already lost myself.

Tomorrow I wake up and I go back to pretending. But tonight...

But you sit there in the darkness
And you make plans but they're hopeless
And you blame God when you're lonely
And you'll call it fate when you show up too late
And it's over.